mspammy's Diaryland Diary ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I'm not afraid. I was checking out Lisa's blog, and I started remembering all of the weird things I was scared of when I was little. And older. I've never been a good sleeper. Any little noise sent me wide awake. This really sucked because I grew up in a house that was built in 1905. It's very creaky, and every step on the hardwood floors echoes up the (also hardwoord) stairs. One of my most frightening memories is hearing footsteps walking back and forth in what sounded like my living room. Back and forth and back again. I listened for what seemed like hours. It was terrifying because I felt like I had to stay awake in case they started up the stairs. What my four or five year old self would have done about someone (corporeal or not) coming up the stairs, I don't know. I realized years later that what I was hearing was people walking around on the porch at a house party next door. The noise problem probably has a lot to do with why I needed a nightlight for a really long time. Until I started sleeping with Levi regularly (remember we started dating when I was 17), I always needed to either have a light on, or my bedroom door open so the light from the hallway came in. I never really worried about privacy. Also, I always needed my closet door shut and with its light turned out. Always. Still do, actually. If the lights are out in the bedroom and I can see the closet glowing poor Levi gets prodded until he gets up to fix things. Fire was a big concern of mine, too. Why? We never had a fire at my house, but I remember there being several around the same time in my neighborhood. I had a box of stuff packed all the time just in case I needed to leave in a hurry. The box also went to the basement with me when the tornado warnings came on. It usually contained a few books (just in case I finished the one I was reading), my 45s, and a select few dolls. I don't really fear much now. And I don't have a box ready anymore. It seems pretty practical, actually, and not a bit paranoid and neurotic. Nope. 8:43 p.m. - Wednesday, Feb. 18, 2004 ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- |
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